Do Nothing

I have a sweet and wise friend, a widow, who once said to me "Joni, the thing is, in life we all need somebody to just do nothing with."  It's so true.  Most of us have friends that would go on a trip with us, go out to dinner with us, go to a movie with us, that would be there for us in times of crisis.  But the majority of our lives -- our minutes, hours and days -- are not spent doing those things.  The truth is that we all have a lot time where we sit around just being lazy, or doing ordinary, unremarkable things.  You know, the things that are so mundane you would annoy your Facebook friends if you posted about them.  These are not things we would do with just anybody -- reading a book, watching the first season of Gilmore Girls for the 26th time, painting our nails, reading our Facebook newsfeed, sorting through recipes we hope to someday actually make, or the ultimate nothing, napping.  (Yes!!)

It takes a certain level of intimacy to "do nothing" with someone.  Usually these "nothing" moments are shared with someone who knows our whole twisted, meandering story, and loves us anyhow.  These people, these partners-in-nothing are our spouses, our sons, our daughters, our sisters, our brothers, or for a lucky few, a lifelong friend.  These people are the ones who are as familiar and comfortable as a soft old pair of jeans.  And even if they are faded, and have a few holes, we know they are irreplaceable.

As a single person whose children are grown and out writing chapters in their own books now, I look back and treasure those times of doing nothing.  When you next have the joy of doing nothing with your precious loves, just savor it and be grateful.

From my heart,
Joni